So I felt like doing this blog in a different color, and blue is an inspirational color to me, not quite sure why but it is. Today is the first day of my real diet plan, nothing to serious just trying not to eat out and eating healthier. Also it is the first day of me really pushing myself to start running and getting back into shape. I believe that it is going to help my mood and better my feelings about myself. I am so blessed to have a job where I am able to excersise with my clients, also helping my clients brightens my day. The day started out a little shabby I didn't want to get out of bed and was blah, but I am up and moving now. Tonight's dinner is nothing to complicated and I think I am going to pack it up and go eat it with the boy at the river, and maybe take walk there afterwards. I decided to put up the recipe for what I am cooking tonight so those reading can try it out if wanted. Also a team update I now have 7 members and one survivor walking with us. It is going to be amazing. Well here is the recipe of the dinner tonight.

If you are eating for one you just have to do one chicken breast.

What you will need:

1 chicken breast
1/4 cup of teriaki (or enough to marinade the chicken)
1 can of pineapple chunks
1-2 servings of rice ( I use white)
1 serving of spinach or brocoli
1 serving of salad (if you choose)
1-2 table spoons of brown sugar

What to do:

If you have time put the chicken in a mixture of the teriaki and brown sugar mix to marinade for the day in the fridge. If not you can marinade before you put it in the oven. Pre-heat the oven at about 350, and place the chicken in covered in foil for about 20-30mins. Then you are going to dump your pineapples in there and let it cook until the chicken is done. Next step is to start your rice, I use instant because of time crunch. Just follow the instructions on there. Now you can steam your brocoli or spinach, or even eat it raw that is your choice. I personal use the spinach as a salad, and steam the brocoli. Once the chicken and rice are done you can cut the chicken up and place it on top of the rice adding the sauce from the pineapple juice and teriaki for flavor and then put your vegatable next to it.

I am not sure how many calories it is but it is healthy and flavorful. So enjoy.

Good for the Soul

With everything that is going on with Haiti I have thought about charity and how it effects a person's self esteem and life. Giving back is good for the soul, and it makes you feel better about yourself which gives you a better self image which we men and women always should have. One of the ways I have decided to give back is to be a captain of the national Relay for Life event held in my hometown. Last fall I lost a very close friend to cancer, and it was a hard time for me. I myself also was very lucky to have the cancer I could have had found early. When I was 19 I had a mole in my belly button and the doctors did a biopsy and determined that I was in the last developmental stage of Melanoma before it became Stage 1. I feel very blessed for it to have been found early. Because of the loss of my friend and knowing others who have survived I decided to start the team. I feel that giving back is going to make me appreciate what I have more. I know that not everyone has time to host a team or go out and volunteer on a regular basis, but even giving a little of your money to a charity will help. Think about this the next time you get a latte, which by the way I love so I understand the need, that you can spend that $4 on a charity and help someone who may not be able to help themselves. I have a few charities that are dear to my heart as well, I think that right now we can all afford to forgo that $4 coffee or $20 lunch and give a little money to Haiti right now since they are in desperate need. Here is a list of a few charities you can get involved in and their websites.

For the person who likes to be hands on:

Habitat For Humanity is a great organization to get involved it, I have done this and the hands on experience is great. Find a local chapter and get involved.

www.habitat.org/

For the person who likes to be active:

There are several organizations that host walks for the support, the one dearest to me is the American Cancer Society and the Relay for Life. You can create a team for a local event or join a team.

http://www.cancer.org/docroot/home/index.asp

For the person who likes to donate money:

There are so many organizations that you can donate money to. There are local orginizations and national ones. Also the above orginizations accept money. And your cities local foodbank is a great way to donate.

The American Red cross is wonderful to donate to and they are always in need of money, especially since the earthquate in Haiti

www.redcross.org/

1 in 150 children are effectd with Autism, working with Mentally Retarted Adults this is a cause dear to me. Donating money furthers research and knowledge is power

www.autism-society.org/

Also if you are not able to donate money you can always give blood every quarter it is always needed.

Remember giving to others will warm the soul, and you can always just give by helping someone out with their groceries, giving a penny at the gas station, and smiling to everyone. It will make you love yourself more.

Most women out there are wanting that special someone in their life, that person that they can grow old with and argue over the remote with, then cuddle deciding to watch the HSN or something crazy like that. I myself have seen some horrible breakups in my day, and I have had some wonderful relationships in my day. Through these I have learned many things and the one thing that I have learned is that there are red flags in a relationship that you should NEVER just let slide. I am not saying that the little things that drive you a little crazy like the him leaving the nail clippings on the floor is something that you should split up over, these are the things that could really determine what your future with him would be like. Also I have learned the things that you should strive to have in a relationship, sometimes it is the little things that drive you crazy that make you love him even more. Ladies out there please don't sell yourself short or think that you can drastically change a man. Men are who they are, yes granted there will be change in a relationship over time based on the other person's wants and needs, but there will never be drastic change.

• If he makes plans with you and then drops them without explanation
  This one is a given or should be for the ladies, yes maybe once he had a flat tire or an emergency but when it becomes a regular thing that is the problem. I was dating this guy and we would make plans to go do something and the plans would keep changing, the first time that he actually stuck to the plans we ended up hooking up and then no more future plans, so also don't just hookup with a guy.
  


• No ambition equals going nowhere in life
  There is a problem with a man who has no ambition in life this person needs to be striving to better himself in one way or another. I was in a long serious relationship and going to college full time and working full time while I was in it, the person that I was with was still living at home(granted I was as well but to save money), he was working at a hourly wage job without any hopes of moving up, and he had dropped out of community college for the most part. We would argue over him going to school, he would say over and over again that he didn't have the money or other lame excuses like that. Needless to say I am graduating college and holding the job of a lifetime and he is hating his job that will get him no where.
  


• Trust is always key
  Never ever stay with someone whether you have just started dating, or have been in a relationship if you can't trust that person. And I think the addage is true once a cheater always a cheater. My ex started acting shady and I thought something was up, but I didn't want to be that girlfriend. One day I was using his computer and his IM opened up with messages from this other woman and how much he loved her, that should have been a red flag but I continued to date him and he did it again.
  


• Feel the spark!
  One of the worst things to do with a relationship starting out is to not have that spark there. This doesn't mean that you have to be all over eachother(allthough it helps) but you need to be able to communicate. And if you have been in a relationship with someone and you just don't feel the spark with them, I mean if you just don't enjoy being around that person then it is time to move on. Trust me dragging it on hoping it gets better only makes it worse.
  


• Never let a man get emotionally or physically aggressive
  If you feel bad about yourself constantly because of him or if he ever raises his hand at you it is time to step away or rather run the hell away.
  


• Don't let him be controlling
  If he won't let you hang out with your friends or family then there is a problem. In one of my relationships my ex didn't want me talking to any other males unless I asked his permission. He found out once that I did and yelled at me making me for about an hour making me cry. Also he did not want me to spend time with my family, but he did want me spending time with his. There was another instance where a male friend of mine was having a rough time, he was considering suicide and his mother asked me to go to his aide while she came in from Houston, well when I didn't call my ex every 5 minutes letting him know if my friends mother was there he went apeshit crazy. Also he did not like my bestfriend of 18yrs, he would call her names and get angry if I spent time with her. Well thank god he is gone.
  


• Make sure he supports himself
  If you are having to pay his bills the kick him to the curb or if you are out on the first date and he just expects you to pay. I know I offer to pay on the first date but if they guy says sure or "I forgot my wallet" then he needs to be gone. I only wished I had realized this sooner. The man I thought I was going to marry didn't have a cell phone, and he didn't have the money to pay the carrier's deposit fee and being the caring person that I am I payed for him and then he used the phone to call his cybersluts...I mean the women he loved.
  

These are the things that were red flags that I saw looking back, I shouldn't have wasted my time but I learned the things that the guy for you will have.

• Laughter and fun
  If he laughs with you or makes you laugh and smile then he is good for you, my current boy is always doing silly things to make me laugh, and to make me smile. In most of our pictures at least one of us is making a goofy face, we also like to race eachother to the truck, or he carries me on his back when we go to wal-mart. If you can have fun and laugh then it is good.
  


• He likes your friends
  If he is willing to go 20 miles to drop your drunken best friend off at her house, even though it looks like she is about to ralph in his vehicle then he is a keeper. Every time we go out in a group my boy buys my friends there drinks not to flaunt his money but to show that he likes them, also he always is the DD for our group of people never any questions asked.
  


• He can support himself
  He doesn't have to be rich, but as long as he can pay his own bills without asking you to pay them or do ridiculous things like put you on his phone plan then you are okay. Also and this is just me if he play fights with you over paying for the bill then he is financially stable.
  

Someone once told me to stop fighting for what is wrong for you and focus on what is right.

Why I started this

Advice is something that is not an easy thing to accept, or an easy thing to give properly without seeming as if you have an "I know better then you " attitude. This leads me to my advice giving encounter in a coffee shop recently. I was at the coffee shop, and I could hear two women next to me talking about relationships. Those are the worst things to talk about in a setting where it is not so quiet. Anywho I heard the women talking and one of them was concerned about this person she was dating just leading her on and dragging her for a loop, and yada yada. Well hearing the items she was saying gave me and idea to start this blog about advice, through my personal experiences. It might make you laugh, it might make you cry, but most of all I hope that it makes you think. You don't have to take heed to what I am saying, afterall it is just another opinion out there. Also I will have personal stories of things that have happened to me and I think those will make you laugh. In that I hope that you enjoy.